Dance...

I love to dance.
I wish I was the best dancer out there. Sadly, I'm not.

I've only been dancing since I was around twelve or thirteen. I took dance one year, had to stop because we couldn't afford it, then danced again. This will be my fourth year of dance. I feel like I'm terrible, but people say I'm not that bad. I'm not sure exactly what to think though.

I would love to be a dancer. But I don't think I have what it takes. Obviously my confidence is pretty low, which doesn't help me much...at all.

I don't know. I know girls who are amazing, I mean AH-MAZE-ING, dancers and I almost hate them for it. They've got my dream in my hands. I've always loved to dance. I use to think it was too girly (Yes, I was a girl who didn't want to be a girl. I had too many brothers...what can I say?). But I danced a lot anyway. I remember playing the music from movies (like "Best Days Of Our Lives" by Baha Men on Shrek) and dancing in the living room. I didn't know it, but I freakin' loved to dance.

I never realized that till I was around twelve. I remember sitting in the car one day with my mom and randomly saying, "I think I want to try dancing." I had already tried cheerleading because a friend of mine had wanted to. Just so you know; all stereotypes about cheerlearders are TRUE.

Anyway, I started off at this dance studio in our small little town. I could only take one class because we couldn't afford any more than that. I loved it. I only had one dance in the recital, but I was so happy. I had never done anything like it before and was so excited that I actually got up and danced in front of people. I mean, I'm afraid to speak in front of people.

I was crushed when my mom said I couldn't do dance again the next year, it cost too much. I would literally sit and cry in my room over it at least once a month. And, if you know me, I hate crying. At school that year, a fellow class mate was handing out sign up sheets for their ball-room studio. I clung to that thing. The whole school year I kept it in my dresser and would cry over it. After two months it was tear stained, ink smeared. It sucked.

Luckily, we found another dance studio we could afford and I adore it. My dance teacher is old, funky and a ball of energy and I love her. Over the past two years, I've had some major ups and downs. Just a few months ago, I got so frustrated with my dancing that I was thinking about quitting it. I didn't. Why? Because I love it too much.

I love dance.

That's why I want to be the best at it. But...can I be? I don't know. I feel like I can't be. In fact, I feel like I can't even dance.

Sigh.
>insert sad face<
I feel so dramatic right now. But I just had to vent and I made this blog to full out vent on.

XD

Okay, I'll stop now.
Grey. :]